Protecting Yourself – How to Leave
What to do if you are in an abusive relationship!
| 1. | Plan ahead. Think of a safe place you can go to if an argument occurs. |
| 2. | Make a list of safe people you can count on. After making the list, commit it to memory and then destroy it. You do not want to take a chance that he will find it. |
| 3. | Keep some money with you at all times, money to get on a bus, or take the subway or make a phone call. |
| 4. | Memorize important phone numbers. Again, don’t leave them around where the abuser can find them. |
| 5. | Set up a “code word or a sign” to alert family, friends or co-workers that you need help. |
| 6. | Think ahead of things you can say to your partner if he becomes violent. |
| 7. | Remember, you have the right to be safe, to live without fear or violence. |
What to do once you have left the relationship!
| 1. | Change your phone number. Make sure it’s unlisted. |
| 2. | Get an answering machine and screen ALL your calls |
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| 3. | Document and save all contacts, phone messages, threats, injuries. |
| 4. | Change the locks if the batterer has a key. Install dead bolt locks to make it harder for anyone to break in. |
| 5. | Avoid staying alone. |
| 6. | Plan ahead of how you will get away if your abuser confronts you. |
| 7. | Only agree to interact with him in a public place. |
| 8. | Vary your routine. |
| 9. | Notify school (if you have kids) and work contacts of possible harassment. |
| 10 | Call a shelter for battered women. |
Information: Courtesy of American Psychological Association, The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence
