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It’s OK to Be Sexy …… But It Is Not OK to Be Sexual
What’s all that about? How can we be sexy without being sexual? We exist, we are alive, therefore we are sexual beings. Men do not put such constraints on themselves. Neither do they have the right to put those constraints on us. We are not property like a car or a jacket. We exist, we breathe, we hurt when we are cut or get sick just like they do and we will one day die, just like they will. Yet, for generations after generations, men have believed the notion that they somehow have those rights and we do not. Not true, it is just a belief. Just like any belief, it started out for a reason, whether valid or not.. Then through time, it became part of the belief system that is taken as truth. It is not true. Without females being willing to have sex and to get pregnant, the species would die. In less than 100 years, the era of human beings existing on this planet would come to an end.
If you lined up 200 males all buffed up, strong, handsome, virile, loaded with testosterone and muscles, or 2,000 males or 20,000 males with a year’s supply of Viagra or any of the male enhancement products currently available, or even a 5 year supply, but no females, the species would die. The survival of the species depends on women being open to having sex and getting pregnant. So why is so much energy spent on denying females the freedom to be sexual, a freedom males do not deny themselves, when the survival of the entire species depends on it?
Sex is everywhere. Sex sells everything from cars to hamburgers to toothpaste to jeans. Sex has become a tool, a financial tool to increase sales and earn huge profits. Women’s breasts are exposed to promote the latest widget and to entice men to spend, spend, spend. But, should a woman expose her breast for something as natural and important as breast feeding, then everyone is outraged. The focus on the female body as a sex object with emphasis on having the perfect hair, large Barbie Doll breasts, pumped up lips, sparkling white teeth, and weight hovering near starvation is actually a back-lash against the gains we have made. It is the latest attempt to put us back is some perceived “place” where we “belong”. Being in charge of our lives and being smart, sexual and powerful beings makes society very uncomfortable. Sex has also been used as a tool to hurt, abuse, shame and punish, even to destroy another person’s life. The truth is that sex is the life force energy of the entire universe. The life that exists anywhere on this plant depends on sex to continue to exist. We females carry that energy within us.. It is part of who we are as living beings.. To deny us the freedom and right to express ourselves as sexual beings is to deny us part of our existence, denying part of the wholeness of who we are. And why, just because somewhere in time, someone was uncomfortable with his own sexual desires and rather than deal with it, decided to put the blame on his female partner as the source of the problem.
Sex is as old as life. Originally, there was cell division that created new life. The new cell was a clone of the original cell, with all the vulnerabilities of the original cell. This form of creating new life limited the complexity of the organism and thus limited the expansion of possibilities. Only when evolution developed sex as the means of creating new life were more complex organisms possible. Along with the diversity that sexual creation of new life afforded, came the defenses that allowed the organisms to survival and to increase in numbers and complexity.
It is very sad that something as important to survival as sex has been turned around and reduced to creating only craziness. Human females are the only females on the planet that prim for the males. In every other species, it is the male who must impress the female. The incredible, beautiful display of feathers of the male peacock epitomizes the ultimate extremes the males of other species go to win the heart of the female. Yet, pick up any magazine at any news stand and you will see a sexy, scantily dressed beautiful female on the cover. She is “Eye candy” for the males, and an impossible, unreachable standard of perfection for the females. Society expects us to be wearing the latest fashions, even if that fashion is a skirt that is impossible to bend over in without exposing our panties, or a shirt that is not quite long enough to cover our belly button. There are even cruel and hurtful remarks made to girls who are not wearing the latest fashion.
Yes, sex is everywhere. But not sex information. Society is appalled at a teenage girl that gets pregnant. In some schools, getting pregnant is a reason to be expelled. Yet that same school would not give that girl the information she needed that would have prevented her from getting pregnant in the first place. Many adults have an unexplainable fear around sex? They get uncomfortable if you try and have a serious discussion with them about sex. If you asked them what is it about sex or specifically about women having sex, that scares them, they would not be able to give you an answer. Yet, tell them to talk about sex with their partners or their kids and they back away. Most adults don’t want to deal with the actuality of sex. They prefer it to be something they do in secret, when no one’s looking, but don’t tell anyone, especially the kids. In primitive societies, sex is open and no stigma is attached to sexual activities. Children grow up knowing about sex because it is not hidden or condemned or shamed. Will we ever get there? We call them primitive, uncivilized and think of them as inferior to us. Except there is no child abuse or pornography or sex trade, so who is the civilized and who is the primitive?
Our society values innocence. But often, the value of innocence is seen as a higher value than the value of a young girl’s safety. This same society does very little to curb the exploitation of these innocent children in the child sex trade business because powerful men in high places get their jollies from it. Our society spews out this chorus of “Family Values”. But, in truth, family values is a catch phrase used to cover up a lack of responsibility to protect kids. A study done by the Center for Disease Control and Prevention, www.cdc.gov finds that 1 in 4 teenage girls has a sexually transmitted disease. That is 3.2 million girls. The health of our teenage girls is being jeopardized because our society values innocence above the safety of our youth. But what does “family values” really mean. Is it the father being the king and the supreme authority with the wife and children, especially the female children, being the serfs who must blindly obey? I would think that family values would mean valuing the family enough to do whatever it takes to protect them and to teach them what they need to know to stay safe. The press argues “the people’s right to know”. Well, what about our kids, they are people and what about their right to know?